Don't look back in anger -oasis-

Bonjour mes amis!! I realise that the post is waaaay too long, and that's why I devided it in as many moments as I could, so you don't have to read it all at once...

In all my life I've never been to a surprise party, and this weekend I got to participate in two fo them.. And it's not fair that I don't get to write about something so simple, happy and unimportant as that, because I'm mad, and I "need" to write about that!! (why can't I have just one silly shallow post?). The one I had yestarday was for a very close friend, whose 18th birthday was a month ago but since she didn't celebrate we decided to throw her a party/meeting (and 18th birthday it's very important)

1st moment:

Unfotunatly my sister happens to be her friend too, ever since they threw a party for the jonasbrothers-fans in my school (and of course since they both like that stupid band-wannabe thay became friends there) I don't really mind that they're friends I just don't like going to partys with her because she's a pain in the ass. At first she didn't even wanted to go just because she didn't wanna be with me. And I pointed out that that was really unfair to our friend (although I would have been happier if she stayed home). In the end my mother convinced/forced her to go so she did.

In the party she kept bothering me by giving me the camera and asking me to take pictures, and then taking it away and then bringing it back, and while I had it she kept constantly asking if i was taking pictures (I took a few but I wasn't about to spend the whole party as a photografer) And by the end of the party when only a few people was left she started bothering me with wanting to leave, and if it had been up to me i would have stayed a little longer, but she talked to my mother who started texting ME about how WE(?) weren't leting her sleep and that we should try to find an hour to leave that was good for both of us (1st of all it's not like if I knew at what hour I would want to leave and 2nd there is NO negotiating when it comes to my sister, and she knows that). So i just let her win, and I started calling cabs, but I wasn't able to get any, so I told her to try herself, Somehow she got one rigth away by calling the same companies I called, so she came to me and said "was that so hard to do?" I just held all the multiple things I wanted to yell at her. It was HER the one who wanted to leave and I tryed getting one for a long time, and she didn't even thank me..

2nd moment

When we got home I just had a glass of water and headed straigth to my room without saying a word to her. (Ididn't mention before that my little cussin was sleeping over at our house and had to sleep with my brother where there is no other bed or matress than his).So when I get to my room my matress was gone and my room was a mess. My brother happened to be awake and he told me that they sent me a text message (that I didn't recieve) telling me about that, TELLING ME, not asking for my permision but telling me, and he didn't ever made sure that I got the massage (I mean there must have been a reason for me not to reply!). So I asked him wht was I supoused to do, and it turns out that the idea was for me to sleep in my sister's room with her (yeah right!). Unfortunatly my cousin was sleeping so I didn't get the chance to get into the whole thing. "I decided" (I didn't actually have much other choice) to sleep in my bunker bed , wich is not bad, but I have the right to sleep in my bed when I want to. So I tried to fall asleep and decided to talk about it in the morning.

3rd moment

I woke up and had my breakfst without talking to anybody. When my brother woke up we started arguing about how he has no right to touch my stuff without my permission and about how he could have sent my coussin to my sister's bunker bed and have her sleep there, or how he could have taken the matress from the bunker bed, and how he should have asked for my permission before geting into my room, making a mess in there and stealing my matress! And I pointed out that it was a total lack of respect for me and my room! But aperently he had the rigth to do whatever he wanted because he had to take care of my cousin in my dog and my sister's dog (the dogs sleep inside with us so he had to sleep with them), I don't get what he's complaining about! I'm the one who always takes care of her, even if my brother and sisters are home too. And not only does he never take care of her but he complains because he has to take care of her when noone else is in the house! And then our fathers join the discussion and the topic of me and my sister last night comes up, and I start yelling about how they have no respect for my stuff! How my brother does whatever he wants in my room, hoe my sister doesn't understend that this are MY friends and I should be able to leave the party whenever I want and I she should deal with it... And my father starts telling everybody that there's no point on talking to me at the moment because I was being unreasonable.. I mean yes I was yelling but I was being totally reasonable!

4th moment

So a little while later I just go away and my father starts following me arguing with me and I eventually start yelling again and he wants me to shut up, I have the rigth to be mad!! and I have the rigth to let it out!! in fact I SHOULD let it out! But all he cares about is the fact that my sister (not the one from the party) was in the next room with her boyfriend, and it was embarassing... But I kept yelling so my father got out of controll and started chasing me arround the kitchen and my sister came in to complain about the noise. Finally my father caugth up to me and I saw that he was totally out of control trying to restrain himself not to hit me and my sister comes to me and holds me trying to defend me until he finally lets go of me. And I start crying and tell him that it's not fair that he doesn't let me talk and be mad... So I leave once again, this time to my room, but once again he follows, and he tryes to talk to me and I keep telling him to leave and my mother tells him the same thing and this went on for about 10-15 minutes untill he finally left.. 
And after a while of weeping in my room I decided to go to the backyard with the dogs. And after a while of peace he comes again and tries to talk to me but I keep insisting that I do not want to talk to him but he keeps trying and for some reason I get closer to the door but I do not leave, but Ikeep telling him not ton bother me and I raise my voice, so he tells me not to yell because it's an embaresment in front of the neighboors and I tell him that that should be the least important thing to him rigth now, but he tells me that to him it's the most important, so I decided not to listen to his shit anymore and leave..

Conclussion

It just makes me so mad!! is it too much to ask for a little respect for my room? is it too much to ask to go to my friend's birthay without anyone bothering me? Don't I have the rigth to be angry? And don't I deserve to let that anger out?

How do I end up being the bad guy here? I don't understand why my mother complained to me when it was my sister who woke her. I don't get why doesn't my brother agree that it was wrong for him to mess up my room without even asking, and I don't get why my mother defends him! And I don't undestand why my father won't let me be angry!and why does he care more about what the neighboors think (specially since they are just a bunch of idiots) than the fact that I'm mad and that I have the rigth to be, and that it's not good to keep the anger inside of me! So in the end I'm mad at my whole family (except my biger sister who is always the first to step up whenever my father looses it) and they probably think I'm the one who should apologize... (Well, maybe I should apologize for messing up my brother's room just out of anger, but that's it! but since he didn't apologize for what he did I won't apologize either!specially since my mother had me fix that...)

Merci for reading!! No, really if you took time out of your life to read this hole thing, then I'm really thankfull!

PS: -the bird bites-(yes I'm gonna write that in every PS) I didn't choose the title of this post becasue it related to the post, but because in moment 4 when I was in my room and on the backyar this song just kept playing in my head(I don't know why). But I guess it kind of relates just a bit to the post (specially in the anger part)